Sending Money, Trust, and Where the Line Is

We should say this directly, because it matters and because it is uncomfortable.

Many of us grew up in families where money moves constantly between people who love each other. School fees for a nephew. A hospital bill for an aunt. Rent for a younger sibling. Sending money is not transactional to us; it is how we show we are still part of each other's lives, even from across the ocean.

Romance scammers know this. Many of them come from the same places we do, speak the same languages, and understand precisely which words to use. The story is always urgent and always plausible: a mother in hospital, a visa fee due Friday, a phone that broke and a laptop needed for the job that will finally let them visit. And it is always accompanied by affection, because affection is the point of the exercise.

So here is the line, and we would ask you to hold it whatever your heart says: do not send money to someone you have not met in person. Not a loan, not a gift, not a top-up, not "just this once." Not through a bank, not through a friend, not in gift cards, not in crypto. If a person cannot survive the weeks it takes to meet without your money, that is the answer to the question you were asking.

A few signs, none of them proof on their own, but worth noticing together. They have professed love very fast. They cannot do a video call, or the video is short and dark. Their story has details that shift. There is always a reason the meeting has to be postponed. The request for money arrives right after a moment of closeness.

If you have already sent money and now suspect something is wrong, you have not done anything shameful. You were kind, and kindness was used. Stop sending. Screenshot the conversation. Report the profile to us; a person reads every report, and a report can protect the next member. If the amount is significant, you can also report it to the Canadian Anti-Fraud Centre.

Generosity is one of the best things about us. It should be given to people who have earned it, in person, over time.